Another Short Film...Critique Greatly Appreciated

[Jonathan Treherne]

Hi Everybody at the www.cinematography Forum,

 

Thank you for everybody's wise words and great advice, I have come on a great amount since I have started following this forum. I have just finished a short film (about 35 minutes in duration) for my 3rd, and Final, year in University. I am studying 'Film & Television Production' in the UK and would love any creative/constructive criticism that people have so that I can improve/gain some skills. This is my first short film I have shot & lit myself although I have worked on other capacity's on some very small independent films.

 

Here is a trailer that our group have produced, i'm looking for advice to do with camerawork/lighting rather than trailer editing (as I only had partial input on this). Obviously it goes without saying we don't have copyright for the songs used but this is okay for our module:

 

 

This was shot on a 5D mk II (as is commonplace for student films).

 

Many, many thanks for the time taken to watch the trailer and provide feedback.

 

All the Best,

 

Jonny Treherne

[Bob Speziale]

Not sure why there are no comments. I just joined the forum and saw your trailer. As a novice myself it looks very well shot and very well acted. Maybe it's the fact I'm in the US, but I didn't hav a clue to what the film was about. It seemed like all action and no discernible story. Hope that helps in some way.

[Simon Wyss]

Not to be offensive or negative in any way, only one thing I see that I see so often:

 

Constant slight hyperfocus. Try to pull out the lens a little bit more, set the plane of sharpness closer up since the depth of field spreads asymmetrically in front of and behind that plane.

 

Another point is: why the chopped movements when you have a human subject—if they are in? I find that very forbidding, with all movies.

 

You have very good actors, let them pull the audience. Technics should not disturb.

 

An old fart’s opinion