Yes, I should have clarified. Both shots are on a white cyc wall/floor.
The monitor had a regular 709 LUT on it. That's kind of what is confusing us - when I add a 709 LUT in resolve it looks rather warm. But day of the shoot on the monitors with 709 LUT, the image looked pretty balanced. At this point I'm thinking perhaps it was the day-of monitor that was inaccurate since it sounds like 4300K in Tungsten should actually look pretty darn warm, and not all that balanced looking.
And yes, either the DP mistakenly shot at 4300K or the director changed his mind. But they do not want it warm at all.