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hey phil,

 

 

i dont mean this as a contest or something, i really wanna know what people think of my work and what i can improve. i sent out 98 applications in the last three weeks (bloody 600€ postage costs) and havent gotten many replies so far, apart from a company in london and one in shanghai,quite depressing :/

Edited by Dmuench
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some constructive critic:

 

some models' faces can take direct hard sources and some can't. your models with their round features would have benefitted from a little more softness. if you used a hard reflector to fill them in maybe going through some diffusion would have been kinder.

 

also the shot where the brunette approaches the guy on the beach over his right shoulder looks like she is about to walk past him not toward him. it's jarring to realize that she is about to walk up to him. (does that make sense?) maybe that's an editing thing.

 

 

other than that those spots look nice.

 

good luck

FB

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Very, very cool.

 

My 0.02 would be to work color contrast and expand the palletes you use. A lot of monochrome sequences. They're lit well and it's obviously more than anything I've ever done. All in all, good job and for what its worth, I really dig the style.

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Guest LondonFilmMan

LENGERIE COMMERCIAL - ALL 3 EDITS

 

Air time for commercials is not cheap....so what symbolism did the opening shot (?) of the rock give? Aren't rocks hard? Isn't lengerie soft?

 

The face turning at the end....was it symbolic? Shouldn't that be the body turning instead, showing her curves and seeing more of the product? What symolism did the face give?

 

Might you have opened and closed this with shots that might have been more meaningful/relevant?

 

Also, continuity. The blonde runs the pinkie on her left hand through her hair then the shot you cut to next does not run consistently with that.....does it?

 

In the second edit, there's that rock again. Is that rock a phallic symbol? Are the waves her femininity? Do women like this idea? They are the ones doing the buying. Isn't that rock you? (I don't blame you, they are lovely!) Dunno if I like your 'chop-style' editing and might the facial expressions on those ladies be better? A warmer happier contented smile.... might that have been better?

 

I am not sure about him. I mean, he looked handsome but might he of been a bit more Magnum-looking, including hairy chest?

 

Might you have focused more on showing the materials and performance of your products?

 

For me, I *might* have done something along the lines of the following;-

 

The best looking girl exiting the ocean as if she were a mermaid, establishing her beauty and setting the mood, followed by a very handsome man spotting her and his reaction to her beauty in that lengerie. She'd have a sultry expression because she would in fact be solitary at this point.

 

Then, her walking/moving/jogging over the sand implying comfort, performance and freedom.

 

Then, her lying on the beach running her hand over the sand suggesting softness and smoothness of the lengerie. Her cheek might also be resting on the sand.

 

Then a warm contented smile with the yellowishness of a setting sun twinkling in her eye as he approaches her, suggesting that by wearing this lengerie, true love and warmth will be on its way.

 

Finally, many other girls exit the ocean, implying that the ending to this happy story can be obtained by any female.

 

All best.

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interesting point of view and interpretation :)

 

however, i did neither the editing nor the concept development.

 

those were intended to be cinema commercials, the different versions were just options for the customer, in the end the 29 second version got screened.

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Hiya!

 

I watched the fish film. It wasn't clear to me how Oscar got back in his tank but I guess we can assume he got lucky when he landed. :)

 

The fish film looks beautiful. The trouble is that the dialogue is almost completely unintelligable. Mostly I can't make out a word until the end of the film. The bit on the mobile phone is nice and clear, but the bit in the bathroom, well I have no idea what was said, or what that whole part of the film was about. It detracted from the film really really badly. Maybe you could loop this dialogue?

 

Theres a couple of places where the music really doesn't work for me as well. It seems kind of inappropriate, especially when he is trying to get the fish, as the music sounds like a triumphant march which is not what is happening on screen.

 

Loved the fish, and I loved the use of colour, in fact the film looks sooo good that I can't believe how bad the sound is. :(

 

love

 

Freya

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hi freya,

 

thanks for the comment, unfortunately the sound isnt just bad in the little quicktime file but in the original as well :( our recordist really screwed up badly. thats why we havent sent the film of to many festivals, which i think is a shame.

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hi freya,

 

thanks for the comment, unfortunately the sound isnt just bad in the little quicktime file but in the original as well :( our recordist really screwed up badly. thats why we havent sent the film of to many festivals, which i think is a shame.

 

I can tell because the sound is quite echoey as well (even outside the bathroom). It sounds like the microphone was too far away from the talent or that you were using a cardioid or omni microphone or something. *shrug* It really is a bit scary.

 

However if you can get the original actors in you could loop the recording. In fact I suppose you could be really evil and use different actors. ;) The sound doesn't seem that in synch anyway (in the bathroom) and for most of the shot you don't see her lips so this should be extra do-able.

 

The stuff in the kitchen might be harder to loop however but theres not much harm in trying this.

I don't know if you have a sound friend who can help you. If not and you have no money, you could try to do it yourself even.

 

Theres a few ways you could go about it. Firstly you could take the recording to the location, and play it back and then try and get the talent to repeat the words in the same way, and record them again very carefully. Do it a few times to be sure.

 

Even better, if you have a laptop, you could take the recording on the laptop and use a program such as cooledit to play back the recording, while the talent tries to say the words at the same time. This way you can hear when things are vaguelly in synch. You could even go further and take some software like vocalign with you.

 

Lastly you could loop the sound in studio conditions which might be the best way of doing it in a proffesional situation. Then you could record it dry and add appropriate reverb in post but perhaps that would be more difficult in your situation I'm not sure.

 

I guess it all depends on what you have access to.

 

love

 

Freya

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thanks for the help, my producer was thinking about redoing the whole sound, but now hes busy with a more recent production that won several awards, so he kind of lost interest in this movie i guess :/

if i knew enough about sound editing i would do the recording myself and get two german actors in as well, to do two different language versions.

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Hi,

 

Nice reel!

 

I was just wondering, where did you find the information about the production companies in Shanghai? I used to live in Hong Kong before I moved to England and I am thinking of returning to China to look for work after I graduate.

 

Thanks a lot.

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Hi,

 

Nice reel!

 

I was just wondering, where did you find the information about the production companies in Shanghai? I used to live in Hong Kong before I moved to England and I am thinking of returning to China to look for work after I graduate.

 

Thanks a lot.

 

 

hi,

 

well so far i got all my company adresses from mandy.com :/

well if you find some work let me know *g :)

 

like i said, my quota so far: 98 applications and two answers :(

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Guest 808_Bass

word to the wise, use the same rental house for every job. borrow some swing/tilt lenses for the next job. the frazier for the one after that, then a 435, then a techno-crane usw, usw.....

 

as for your reel. only got 2 spots in. watch out for shiney make-up, it's a show stopper (in my opinion).

 

my congratulations however for being out there and doing out, and opening yourself up for critique on such a public forum.

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thanks for the help, my producer was thinking about redoing the whole sound, but now hes busy with a more recent production that won several awards, so he kind of lost interest in this movie i guess :/

if i knew enough about sound editing i would do the recording myself and get two german actors in as well, to do two different language versions.

 

The editing would probably mostly be easy, but getting a good recording might be hard.

 

I love the idea of getting German actors in too! :)

That would be something.

 

In fact you know you could dub it into some obscure or even made up language, just as long as you got good recordings! :) Maybe you can make friends with someone who knows about sound. It's a shame you are in Australia as I might try and help.

 

As it is you should leave this off your reel. I know that's a terrible thing to say because it's nothing to do with your work, but people will still look down on you for that. They will judge the work as a whole and you may lose jobs for that. Maybe you could just show clips stills and or highlights. That way people can still see the good work you have done without getting stupid ideas into their heads.

 

love

 

Freya

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Dmuench:

 

Are you based/work from both Oz and Germany?

 

 

depends yes, i lived in australia the last 4 years but at the moment i am in germany (to answer your question freya). im fairly flexible workwise anyway, i dont mind traveling a lot for jobs.

 

i only have some scenes form deadly suhsi on my reel, and they are completely without sound, i would put the whole film on my reel, exactly because of the bad sound :/

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depends yes, i lived in australia the last 4 years but at the moment i am in germany (to answer your question freya). im fairly flexible workwise anyway, i dont mind traveling a lot for jobs.

 

i only have some scenes form deadly suhsi on my reel, and they are completely without sound, i would put the whole film on my reel, exactly because of the bad sound :/

 

 

Ooops! I only now looked at your website proper and realise you have a conventional reel and that the films on their own are seperate!

 

It wasn't actually me asking if you were in Germany. I just assumed you were in Australia because that is what it said next to your name. I assume too much which is very bad because I would be unhappy if people assumed things about me. Well actually, maybe not, just as long as people assume good things! :)

 

Will you be in Germany over the summer? I'm planning to travel over the summer if I can get cheap flights and am almost definitely going to Hamburg on my journeys as one of my best friends lives there. Maybe I could travel to the strange place you live in down in Southern Germany and we could try and fix the sound? I would need a floor to sleep on tho.

 

If you want we could shoot a film down there too, on my little filmo and you could D.P. for me? :) It might be fun, although obviously no money and a filmo is very restrictive and I also make weird experimenal work etc etc, but hey...

 

Maybe I can travel around europe making films as I go!!! :)

 

I don't know how much it would cost to get to that place you live in tho. I have to say I've never heard of it before!

 

Anyway, maybe it's a crazy idea, so don't be offended by my suggestion and I certainly won't be offended if you think it is too insane. ;)

 

love

 

Freya

Edited by Freya
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Ooops! I only now looked at your website proper and realise you have a conventional reel and that the films on their own are seperate!

 

It wasn't actually me asking if you were in Germany. I just assumed you were in Australia because that is what it said next to your name. I assume too much which is very bad because I would be unhappy if people assumed things about me. Well actually, maybe not, just as long as people assume good things! :)

 

Will you be in Germany over the summer? I'm planning to travel over the summer if I can get cheap flights and am almost definitely going to Hamburg on my journeys as one of my best friends lives there. Maybe I could travel to the strange place you live in down in Southern Germany and we could try and fix the sound? I would need a floor to sleep on tho.

 

If you want we could shoot a film down there too, on my little filmo and you could D.P. for me? :) It might be fun, although obviously no money and a filmo is very restrictive and I also make weird experimenal work etc etc, but hey...

 

Maybe I can travel around europe making films as I go!!! :)

 

I don't know how much it would cost to get to that place you live in tho. I have to say I've never heard of it before!

 

Anyway, maybe it's a crazy idea, so don't be offended by my suggestion and I certainly won't be offended if you think it is too insane. ;)

 

love

 

Freya

 

sure why not ? check out ryanair, youre form england right ? they have supercheap flight to all over europe.

 

WHAT YOU NEVER HEARD OF HEIDELBERG ?

 

One of the most beuatiful cities in europe and one of the oldest university cities in the world ? im shocked :)

 

 

your idea sounds good, send me an email :)

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sure why not ? check out ryanair, youre form england right ? they have supercheap flight to all over europe.

 

WHAT YOU NEVER HEARD OF HEIDELBERG ?

 

One of the most beuatiful cities in europe and one of the oldest university cities in the world ? im shocked :)

your idea sounds good, send me an email :)

 

I'm sure I've heard of HEIDELBERG, tho for a moment I was thinking of the uncertainty principle. Sometimes I get a little confused. Anyway, yes Heidelberg, I've heard of it, but what's this Mannheim thing? Is that a village somewhere? ;)

 

I looked up Mannheim on the internet and apparently you have a beautiful water tower with carved demons to protect the water or something. Sounds just up my street! :)

 

I will contact you off list in a second.

 

love

 

Freya

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