Please check out my short film. I need some opinions on what I should work on.

Katelyn Ploesser · January 3, 2013

My name is Katelyn, and this is actually my first post on here. I'm hoping to get some good feedback on how I can improve myself in the film industry. In my Film I class, at Webster University, we had to make a film around 5 minutes for our final grade. Everyone did love stories, but I wanted to challenge myself and get out of my comfort-zone and make something different.

I wrote, directed, and edited/colored my film. I had a friend of mine film this on his Canon 5D Markii. We both came up with the shots, but he operated the camera.

I love hearing people's opinions, because I use those to better myself in the end!

Thank you in advance!!!!!!

Edited January 3, 2013 by Katelyn Ploesser

Paul Brenno · January 7, 2013

hi Katelyn, my name is Paul, I'm a DP....your short film is well done...I could tell however that it was a student film, maybe that was the point (??)....My suggestion would be to speed up the action more....there is a movie called " Cube " out many yrs ago (not sure if you know it or not (??), but the plot was about several people waking up in a CUBE, having to work together to get out.....My question applied to that film and yours, Why is she there ???....who put her there ??...

Having an actor in a room by herself, you could establish that in the first 1 to 2 min's, not in 5min's....also, fill on those silent gaps of natural sound with suspensive music, something to hold the viewers attention and give your story it's drama/soul....

Bill DiPietra · January 8, 2013

I saw it as more of an avant-garde film.

The shot composition was very carefully done. But since she was in a white room, I would have emphasized that by slightly over-exposing the image. It gives the sense that something is "off," which it clearly is in this film. Unfortunately the image was pretty flat.

As far as plot, you do need to give a little more away. Not a lot, but even the concepts of avant-garde films need to make some sort of sense. Is the girl trying to escape the room...or herself when she crawls through the wall and discovers her other self in the hospital bed? And why? You should take a look at some of Maya Deren's work, specifically, Meshes of the Afternoon.

But overall, a nice effort. :)