Filmmaking and Girlfriends

[Leo Anthony Vale]

Well, they do shoots of women draped over £250,000 cars. Why not £250,000 cameras?

 

---Alan Gordon used to do that in the 70s.

 

Look up bound back issues of AC at he library.

 

---LV

[Andrew Koch]

I realize that most of the members on this forum are men, but I would be interested in hearing from more of the women about this topic. Several of my female colleagues are currently dealing with the same kinds of issues. If they have children, there will be the added issue of pregnancy (unless they adopt) which would make it difficult to shoot for a period of time. One of my friends is really committed to having a family with children in addition to a successful career as a cinematographer. I would love to here from some of the female professionals about how this would be possible.

 

Thankyou Annie for your insights.

[Guest Daniel J. Ashley-Smith]

You realize they could get the firing squad for that?

Imagine how that would look on TV... "Soldier for firing squad because he didn't believe the war with Iraq was correct". Bush would be kicked out, and then probably killed by 5 million protestors.

[Guest]

"One of my friends is really committed to having a family with children in addition to a successful career as a cinematographer"

 

It won't be possible. Unless she hires some one to have and rear the children for her.

 

Now I'm sure I'll be assailed for my comments. So, rather than speculating on what might be possible, why not focus on what is happening right now.

 

Can any one list five female members of the ASC who have 1-4 children?

 

Heck how many female members of the ASC are there? If it's higher than 10% I'd be surprised.

 

R,

[Guest]

Ok well I answered my own question, I could only find five female names on the ASC list....

 

http://www.theasc.com/clubhouse/inside/index_roster.htm

 

Not 55, just 5. So that would be well below 10% that's for sure.

 

Hmmmmm, a long way to go for gender equity in the DOP field that is for sure.

 

R,

[N DeWood]

Hello Peter,

 

Your are definitely on point.

 

As far as I am concerned, we've become a country of war, troop loving, and flag waving idiots. Amazing how well hated we've become to so many countries. Let the others on this forum support their cocaine sniffing "misunderestimated" president who hates "fereigners," it really doesn't matter because history is always designed to repeat itself. If you show you care or have any decency they'll attack you as a libera.

 

Thanks again for your insights. ;)

 

Nick

 

To my mind, the spirit of "where I'm coming from" in my encouraging Daniel to consider a vocation other than becoming a soldier has a lot to do with what this thread is about: Both the choice of ones vocation, and the choice of how we "love", have consequences.

 

Some people think we're living in our parents' or grandparents' young-adult world. They think we're still living in marriages and relationships -- and economic and geopolitical realities -- of the 1960s or 1950s or earlier. Of course we're not, but they don't know it, because they've been brought up and indoctrinated to believe otherwise, or for whatever reason they've never learned to think for themselves and see who are their real enemies and real allies.

 

So, instead of embracing real love or real peace, they long for things like sexy, feel-good attraction/lust and "peace with honor". The former lends itself better to packaging and comodification, and the latter allows the good ol' "military-industrial complex" to maximize profits until they shift their interests elsewhere, preferrably to another warzone.

 

I believe the reason modern relationships and marriages are so tenuous is because, as far as the titans of industry are concerned, "churn is good". Corporations make more profit when relationships, marriages and families fall apart and then struggle to rebuild over and over again, compared to the economics of stable relationships lasting for decades. Capitalism wants your money, and it doesn't care if your life, relationships, and long-term happiness suffer as a result. You may think "it just feels right" to maintain "time apart" and even separate households, but this wasn't your idea: The marketers and their bosses want it that way, because it's profitable.

 

Relatively speaking, I probably would have welcomed your friends' willingness to put themselves in harm's way AGAINST THE NAZIS DURING WORLDWAR II -- and I probably would have joined them in that cause if any of us had been around back then -- but we haven't faced any similar threat in many, many decades, and certainly aren't now.

 

Your friends have been duped into believing sacrificing themselves and their families is "an honorable service to their country". There was a time many decades ago when that may have been true, but it surely isn't today. Today they are only serving their corporate masters, which in and of itself isn't the worst thing in the world, EXCEPT FOR THE JOB THEY'RE TRAINED FOR AND ARE EXPECTED TO PERFORM.

 

So, no, they're not putting "their life on the line" for me or any other normal folks. Instead, they're doing it for the likes of Halliburton, Mobil Oil and their ilk.

 

This has nothing to do with politics and everything to do with opening ones heart and asking "Who really loves me? Who do I really love?" I guarantee you, the answer isn't George Bush or Tony Blair.

 

What we choose as a vocation, why we choose our mate, how we choose to live, what we choose to believe in, what we choose is worth dying for, and what we choose is worth living for ... they're all intertwined.

 

As the TV wiseman said, "Choose wisely, grasshopper."

[Annie Wengenroth]

I always joke that if I ever do have a kid or two someday, they will be trained like little monkeys to do all my dirty work. First sentence will be "Camera ready". One will label the mags and the other will clean lenses. Bwahahaha.

 

I must say that I don't even consider my gender when it comes to this line of work. I think if anyone has ever doubted that I could lift a Panaflex with a 10:1 zoom and 1000' mag on it, it's because it's probably about half my weight, not because I'm a woman.

 

I think a Camera Assistant calendar is a great idea. Or maybe trading cards. :lol:

[David Sweetman]

I wish I had a woman who was a 1st AC. Then I'd say to her, "Babe, you're the only one pulling my focus."

[Ellen D. McCarn]

When I got out of school, I decided not to go looking for a relationship until I had my career at least partly in order. I wanted to get settled and stay focused on my career before I had to think about including someone else in the crazy lifestyle of a freelancer. One guy I dated simply didn't understand my need to be in the film industry and kept pressing me to get a 9-5. That one didn't work out, needless to say. My boyfriend now is also in the industry. He's a visual effects artist, so he has a set schedule usually, but he understands my need to do what I do. His father was also a Director/DP for 30 years, so that made it easier. He's been on sets, so he understands that I can't tell him when I'll be home, though he may not always like it (especially night shoots). Having a family in this business is really hard to juggle regardless of gender, but I believe it's totally possible. There aren't a lot of female DP's, and fewer who have children, but it has been done. It all comes down to what you want in your life and how hard you're willing to work to make it happen.

[Gillian]

I was really glad to see this thread! I think a lot of us struggle with compatibility of mate and career. It?s been difficult for me to find someone who is as passionate about his work as I am about mine. Usually, when this is the case he is in one of these unusual and spectacular fields!

When I come home, I want him to be just as fired up about his work as I am about mine, and I want to be as interested in what he does as he is about what I do! Let?s face it, looks can fade with age, accidents, and hardships! Compatibility and the ability to work through things through thick and thin?that goes all the way!

 

Actually my (favourite) sister-in-law handles being the wife of her composer hubby rather well. When I went out to work in their studio as a sound editor I saw first hand how to live with the insecurity of the ?feast or famine? mode that is the norm for much of the film industry-and I also saw how a really great husband/wife relationship should work! Pamela, (sis in law) is the queen of ?the bargain? even in the feast years she?s careful and frugal, knowing that a repeat of ?the black year? could always happen again! She?s totally involved, friends with all her husbands? friends, employer?s and coworkers (and wives). My brother states loudly and frequently that without her, he NEVER would have made it! Now, while she is not part of the business, she is his main support and she is interested in his work!

Incidentally, at the beginning of his career, she worked a full time job with health insurance!!!

 

I feel that having one?s significant other interested in what one does is if not vital, then at least desirable! You have the option to educate your potential mate! You?re excited about it! So get HER (or him) excited about it! Tell her why you love it and let your enthusiasm rub off! Teach her! Sit down; watch her favourite movies WITH her (this is how Gilly roped her current boy friend! Grin) and then explain why she was feeling what she was feeling, and teach her about the shots, camera work, lighting etc! There is no better teacher then one who knows and loves his subject.

 

Annie & Ellen - I loved hearing your point of views and it?s great to see more ladies on the board!

 

Mitch??With comment #1 in mind, I will say that I find a woman wearing a toolbelt quite sexy.? LOL

Gillian Thomas

[Annie Wengenroth]

Well said.

 

Not to mention, sometimes the people who care about you, are there to keep you healthy and sane when you are too wrapped up in your work to have a proper perspective on it. Case in point, I was halfway out of bed, ready to go to set today after getting hit with some kind of weird stomach bug...I was ignoring my splitting headache, achy joints, and general queasiness, figuring I'd just suck it up and show up anyway. Sometimes this sort of mentality is just not feasible, but try telling that to someone like me, who once stayed awake for 60 hours in order to juggle work and shooting. Well, the friends I'm staying with practically restrained me at the door and were like, "You're not going anywhere." Finally I caved...called the 1st AC, who was totally understanding ("It's not like we're getting paid- go back to sleep"!), and went back to bed. Gone are the days where I used to fake sick to get out of class...I was seriousy bummed that I couldn't be there today!

 

It's a delicate balance. I sometimes get frustrated that there aren't more people in my life totally riding my ass and telling me to work even harder. I forget that most people don't work on the weekends, or that they sit down for longer than 5 minutes and sometimes they even eat a few square meals a day. I forget that there are people out there in the world who work jobs that they hate because they have different priorities, some of those priorities being the support of a family at all costs. It's a different world... and for me, the question is, how much of this world would I bring a potential significant other into, and how much of it would I allow them to take me out of? It remains to be seen. It would be great to have a boyfriend who I could lie in bed and talk about lenses with but let's get real here! (All I know is, I'm really sick of drinking ginger ale and I can't wait to get back tomorrow! :P)

[Gillian]

Your earlier post just killed me!

Annie wrote: I always joke that if I ever do have a kid or two someday, they will be trained like little monkeys to do all my dirty work. First sentence will be "Camera ready". One will label the mags and the other will clean lenses. Bwahahaha.?

Speaking of which this is a photo of me and my nieces and nephews taken in September. Notice what my nephew is reading!

(Gilly with yonger sis and a few "friends")

 

He asked for that as his ?bed time story!!!? I?m totally not kidding! As soon as it stops raining Auntie is taking him out to ?make movies? with his video camera. Never too young to start them off right! LOL We have a joke in the family that as soon as the rising generation is tall enough we?re putting them to work! Currently the eldest is 10?just another 6 years?

Re?:Faking sick to get out of class? these days we?re all ?faking well!? LOL

[David Sweetman]

Well, I'm glad to see this thread is back on track, as this issue has been giving me worry lately and this thread has been helping immensely. I've heard how straining the industry can be on relationships. I want a family and I want to direct, and I don't want to give up one for the other.

 

Hearing stories of those who make it work is comforting. For me, divorce will never be a posibility or even a whisper of a thought. So I need to know I have someone who will stay with me no matter what, but I also don't want to make it hard to stay with me -- I want to be able to provide for my family, and not rely heavily on my spouse's income.

 

But heck, I've got a while to go before I start thinking about spouse or income, so I guess I'll just wing it for a while and see what happens.

[Paul Bruening]

Hey guys,

 

My wife is my producer. She's dynamite. The rules for good work relationship are the same as good relationship- Honesty, honesty and honesty. She's especially good at using her good looks and cleavage for getting things like locations, props and other support to keep the budget down. That may seem chauvanistic, but we've been a good team. When we get back to the apartment, during pre-production, she'll grab her boobs, lift them up at me and say, "Guess what these got for free, today."